Thursday, June 25, 2009

memories..
























































Thursday, June 18, 2009

away.

salam..
i`ll be out from blogging world for a period of time.
how long would that be?
well,it depends.
i have final exams next week.there will be 2 papers only.
most importantly,on the 24th.
i hope i would not be away for too long.
nervous.scared to death.
hope everything is going to be okay.
Ya Allah,i hope everything will be smooth-running.Amin.
otherwise,its going to be the biggest challenge in my life..

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

my apology to you.


salam.
i have to admit.
ape2 benda yang berasal dari rasa marah dan dendam,
takkan ade penghujung yang baik.
entry yg sebelum ni,penuh dgn amarah.
tanpa beringat,dia juga slalu ade untuk aku.
tanpa beringat,yang aku juga perlukan dia.
despite ape pun yg terjadi.
support each other is what we should do.
mungkin langkah yg aku ambil sebelum ini salah.
terlalu agresif mungkin.and harsh.
mungkin aku terlalu bongkak.membuatkan dirinya terasa begitu kecil.
sedangkan tidak.dia tidak kecil.
there's always 2 sides of story.
bukan semua salah dia.
bukan juga semua salah aku.

saya minta maaf.sepenuh hati.kepada awak.
i wish we could be as close as before.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

should i even dream bout it?




ok ok dokay..



salam everyone..



im back blogging.hee.



well,ni sebenarnyer tak boleh tidur..



im thinking of something.



that is...






I NAK KURUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!



i know i know i know..



some may said,that u had heard bout it ages ago.but nothings changed.



hurm...






i cant even look myself in the mirror..



not that i hate what Allah has created, but its just what i had done to it,damaging my body and still i did nothing so far to even cure or heal it.



i need to do something.im 24.i wanna look like 24.or even younger.



impossible?possible.



i hope. hee.



i need to do it by myself.



how am i gonna do it?



ntah.no idea so far.



but right now,one thing for sure,i wanna look like her.



who's 'her'?

from this to

this.can ah? heee



some people may say,alahai berangan la wanie ni.

i couldnt care less.


from tomorrow onwards,im going to do something or anything,so i can be like her.or at least be 10% out of her.hahaha.crazy me?


well,a challenge to myself.seriously.


i need to fix something.

lesson 2: what goes around,comes around.

continue dari previous entry..

lesson 2

what goes around,comes around.believe it.


wher should i start?

simple sbenarnyer.ape2 aje yg kita buat kat orang,pasti akan terjadi pada kita.

itu janji Nya.

sebab itu Allah bagi kita akal.so that we can think before we act.

tapi kita ini manusia.we are open to mistakes.

BUT! we need to learn from the mistakes.tak boleh berdiam diri saje.

ok back to the lessons.


sebelum ni,ade la something terjadi kat aku.

nak cerita pun payah.sakit hati pun yer.

but to make it short and simple, it started when that person accused me of something that i wasnt meant to do.

that in some way i had hurt that person.that i neglected that person.that i had isolated that person.

believe me.that wasnt the intention.

but unfortunately,that was what that person felt.

i said sorry.and then we were okay.


BUT NOW! guess what?!that person did exactly wht i did before.see darling?it was not my intention to hurt u.i was just making friends.just like what u are doing now.the different is,i can totally understand.i accepted it.


but what makes me hurt is,the words that u gave to me before.about me isolating u.about me hurting you.for doing THE SAME thing u are currently doing.its the words that hurt me.not the action.take note on that.thats what makes us different.


so,what should i do with the situation?

all i can think of is,to learn from it.im not sure whether u learn from it or not.

but i surely do.how i wish i colud throw back those words u gave me before.

but im not as cruel as u.i guess.just not yet.

i can still bear with it.


so sakit hati whenever i think about it.

well, what goes around,comes around kan? ;)

Allah is The Almighty.He had shown it to u.

i should be thankful.i am.


rindu sama kalian. :(

Friday, June 12, 2009

lessons in life

dah lebih sebulan tak update blog.

rasenyer la..

hee.

byk sebanrnyer yg nak diupdatekan..

tapi busy jugak.

busy tido sepanjang hari.

busy pegi class.

busy beronggeng dgn adik2.

busy beronggeng degn kawan2.

busy ym-ing.

busy segala lah!


dalam byk2 busy tuh, byk jugak yg aku belajar..


lesson 1

jangan minta sesuatu yg kita sendiri tak pasti mampu utk buat atau tidak.


all this while, aku slalu jeles bila tgk org ade couple..

on weekends, pegi mane2 pun jumpa couple..

aku sendiri pun teringin gak nk ade companionship..

nak ade org blanja tgk movie ke pegi jalan2 ke..(bukan kau ye mint..ni aku maksudkn lelaki.hehe)

bila ade masalah nk jugak bercerita..(ye fana aya mint disya,korang mmg pendengar setia..tapi kadang2 nk gak bermanja.kang aku bermanja dgn korang kang lain plak jadinyer..haha)


dan selama ni jugak,klau dgr kawan2 yg nak kawin or dah kawin,stress aku akan datang secara mengejut! dalam kepala aku,'KENAPA AKU TAK DE CALON LAGI?NAK KAWIN JUGAK!'


kawan2 dah terbiasa dgn sikap aku yg satu ni.

adik2 pun sama.

dah byk kali diorg advice aku.

masuk kepala satu hari je(belum jodoh,ade la tuh nanti,ko tak ready lagi sbenarnye.dan bermacm2 alasan diorg bagi sbb nk calm kan aku) tapi satu hari je la.esok maraung lagi.gelenyah teh. :))


dan pada satu hari, ade la seorang hamba Allah yg baru dapat hidayah.alhamdulillah.Allah itu Maha Esa kan.Niat di hati dia nk cari seorang isteri.aku kenal pun sbb ade org kenalkan.

mula2 on the phone, mmg he had made his intention clear,that he is looking for a wife.untuk bimbing dia.and he asked bout my opinion.i said,jumpa dulu.and we agreed.


bila dah jumpa,aku pula tak rasa we can go further.takde spark.and cara dia tak kena dgn cara aku.tak salah dia pun.bila jadi mcm ni,aku berfikir jugak.dulu nk sangat kawin.dah ade calon depan mata,tak nak plak.ape sebanrnyer yg aku nak?!


bila direnung2kan,baru aku faham.Allah tunjuk pada aku,aku tak ready sebenarnye utk kawin.yg selama ni aku merungut yg aku ni takde calon nk kawin tapi nk sangat kawin,sebenarnye aku tak ready lagi tuk sume tu.Ya Allah..byk cara sebenarnyer Allah nk bagi hidayah dan jalan.and i guess this is one of it.


pada yg mungkin terluka,saya minta maaf.ade yang lebih baik utk awak.semoga Allah akan terus memberi cahaya hidayah Nya buat awak.


kawan2 yg selama ini tahan dengan kerenah aku.terima kasih jugak. :))

adik2 yg tak jenuh dgr keluhan hati saban hari,aku sayang korang.sangat2. :))


lesson 2? tunggu entri seterusnya. ;)